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Old 10-28-2006, 07:31 AM   #1
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Default Real Ultimate Power

Real Ultimate Power is a book about ninjas written by a 12 year old (the author isnt actually twelve but writes it as if he were.)

It sounds stupid but I swear its the funniest thing I have ever read. It had me laughing out loud for almost the whole book. Its awesome to read while you are high.

Check this book out I swear you wont regret it unless you are a humorless robot. I couldnt put it down and finished it in a night.

Here is an excerpt:


Seppuku with a frisbee


Seppuku is the ancient art of killing yourself if you get super pissed and can’t find anybody else to kill. Ninjas use all sorts of crap to kill themselves—guns, ropes, knives, lasers, spears, etc.—and don’t even think twice about it. These guys would kill themselves for just about any reason and often for no reason at all: that’s why we there are so few ninjas today.

But if you want to commit Seppuku and you’re like me, you don’t have access to stuff like lasers. But there’s hope. I tried to kill myself by swallowing a frisbee a couple of times—and believe me, it’s pretty cool. The only catch is you have to be really super pissed to do it.


Step 1 Get a frisbee from the store or friend.

Step 2 Clean the Frisbee.

Step 3 Make sure your parents aren’t around

Step 4 Put something slippery on it, like butter or cream.

Step 5 Get really super pissed.

Step 6 Fold the Frisbee hard (this is crucial)

Step 7 Keep folded and insert Frisbee into mouth hard.

Step 8 Push hard until you can’t see it.

Step 9 Wait.

Step 10 Die.


If you succeed, everybody will be like “Holy Crap!".
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Old 10-31-2006, 12:04 AM   #2
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real ultimate power was originally a website (realultimatepower.net) my friends and i discovered this website about 6 years ago
i have read the book too and i have to say it is great
but i have a slight obsession with ninjas
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Old 11-01-2006, 10:10 PM   #3
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If I'm correct ninjas love to wail on guitars...
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Old 11-28-2006, 02:35 AM   #4
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I LOVE THIS BOOK!!!
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