joining the military and have plan to smoke bud *READ*

Discussion in 'Urine Testing' started by zongmaster, Jun 17, 2002.

  1. zongmaster

    zongmaster New Member

    ok, so i'm joining the air force in one month and i want to keep smoking bud. so i've got a plan. first off, i'm gonna tell the recruiter that i've never smoked bud before so that they don't mark me as have ever smoked before. and i'm quitting smoking for a month, so i'll be clean when i get my drug test. now heres the catch... the air force is gonna test me randomly while i'm in service, so i was wondering if anyone knows how it works? do they come into where your working and demand you to piss right then or there? or do they tell you in advance? if they make you take it right away i would tell them i don't have to go to the bathroom, and ask them to reschedule. and what i would do is just keep a clean sample of urine at my home at all times. also i'd have one of those little bladder pouches with the hose that you can fake like your really peeing. i heard that they stand in the bathroom when you piss. is this true? if so, do they just stand behind you or something or do they sit and actually watch you? if they just stand behind you then i know i could get away with the little plastic bladder and hose thing. so anyways, anyone whos in the military, do you think this would work? does anyone else smoke bud whos in the air force or any other service? thanks for any advice because i really wanna keep smokin while i'm in the service.
  2. Paulie420

    Paulie420 New Member

    I think instead of figuring out how to get around it, maybe you should look at all the consequences. I mean, a dishonorable discharge isn't all that good on yer record. Also, I don't want someone who is protecting my well being getting ripped all the time. Dear god, I hope the red light doesn't go off on a Friday evening... Hehhee..
  3. krunkpuppy

    krunkpuppy New Member

    Well, I speak from experiance.
    I joined the Army in 98 and Since have become a reserve soldier. Anywho, Don't lie to the recruiter. They're job is to get you in, basic weeds out those that can't cut it. The recruiter is on your side. I've even heard of em helping teens clean out there system before the first test. After you're through trainging and in your everyday waorking envirement you will be tested randomly. Like once at most twice a year. The test will be unannounced. That's why it's called a random. Anywho, know the consiquences. I have a high ranking connect who'd tell me the date of the test and I'd call in sick that morning and return with a doctor's not excusing my abscence. I never once took a drug test in over 4 years in the service except for the first one when I joined. Good luck, but don't lose sight of your priorities.
  4. ikari

    ikari Seasoned Activist

    I have enough trouble trying to drive a car while stoned, i can't even imagine how it is to fly a plane while stoned..
  5. PokeSmot

    PokeSmot New Member

    Not worth the risk. If you do it on your spare time, that's fine, but I don't want you flying bombers that cost millions of dollars of my tax money while you're high :D
  6. GrowFun21

    GrowFun21 New Member

    Scratch (****can) this plan

    Te recruiter will help you get in, that is there job. Once your in, you will get caught if yo smoke weed. If you pass your initial test and then get caught later, you will be dishonorably discharged......on a job application that is just as bad as doing will have one helluva time getting hired. And secondly, when will you have time to smoke? You will be getting your as busted all through bootcamp and gettin about 5 hours of sleep a night. You never knnow what there gonna make you do or when, so being high a 2 am is not really safe. This plan is stupid....Im not in the armed forces and dont plan on joining for any reason (Im in college now), but i know a few guys who were let go because of weed. Secondly, I dont want anyone who is high flying a multimillion dollar fighter plane. If your not disciplined enough to quit for a few months until you are off duty and made it, your never gonna be disciplined enough to make it there in the first place......think this one over man, the pros dont ouweigh the cons
  7. dont do it. The record if you get caught (dishonerible Discharge) will haunt you for the rest of your life.
  8. RollOneForMe

    RollOneForMe Guest

    Orifice To Cup!

    Not sure about AF, but Army is now supervising their tests and verifying orifice to cup urine transfer. Impossible to substitute that way. Find another profession, or get clean.

    I wouldn't want to put my life on the line if I thought a stoner was maintaining my equipment. Don't get me wrong, but drugs and military are a bad combination. They don't follow OSHA rules for safety, and your life can easily be on the line during any training. Military training happens virtually every day, and teamwork is required for every mission I know of. If you were a pilot, would you want to fly in one of the worlds most advanced aircraft knowing that the guy working on it may have been under the influence?
  9. zongmaster

    zongmaster New Member

    hahaha guys, i'm not going to be flying planes or anything, the air force has a lot of normal jobs like computer jobs and mechanical jobs... i'm probably gonna work in the motor pool. anyways, i'm still trying to decide whether i should join, or if i should just get a full time job and go to college. i think getting a job is a better idea. that way i can stay smokin' :D

  10. GrowFun21

    GrowFun21 New Member

    Go to college.....

    If your not willing to give up smoking, go to college full time. Go into a bit of debt, it will be worth it when you get your degree. Not to mention, college is the best polace for smokers. You have access to just about any type of weed and no one cares what you do, it is almost like you smoke cigarettes or something.......College is the way to go
  11. zongmaster

    zongmaster New Member

    yeah i think thats a good idea. i'm thinking about just getting a cheap apartment right near my work, and just ride my bike to work and school. theres a community college right near where i'd be living, so i could just bike everywhere. i really don't want to give up smoking bud, its not really that i'm a chronic addict, its just that its so damn good, and its my way of life. i don't want to give my way of life up for the government or anyone else. thats just the way i feel.

  12. GrowFun21

    GrowFun21 New Member

    Then it looks like you have your decision made

    Just be careful not to rule out any college based on price. I am a student who works in the financial aid department of my school, and you should apply to any college you want to go to regardless of price and see what kind of package you get, you would be suprised......just keep your options open....good luck
  13. MJane

    MJane Senior Member

    Tell you what, though, that would be one hell of a way to dodge a draft idf there ever was one. Damn, I'd be smoking every day!!!
  14. MJane

    MJane Senior Member

    DUDE, I was in the Navy for 4 years, so take my advice....GO TO COLLEGE!!! Of course, I was in the military during the Clinton era, so it will probably be better now. At least George W Bush gives a damn about the military people, unlike Clinton.
  15. bapesterz

    bapesterz New Member

    yeah u disgraceful mothafuk.... i can understand if you are trying to quit in order to go in the AF but you boldly want to smoke during service? i hope you do get in and then get caught couple weeks later and get discharged. military dont need druggies. i can understand if u were

    [Mod Note: Flaming is bad. Shame on you!!!]
  16. puntteam

    puntteam New Member

    I'm going to play devils advocate for a moment -

    So while it's not okay to relax and smoke some herb while serving, it IS okay to go out and get shitfaced drunk, acquire a hangover, then report?

    People in all walks of life smoke herb. Some of them are in highly safety sensitive positions and don't just flip burgers at the local MC D's. I'm a firm believer that a stereotypical pothead would be a pothead with or without the pot.

    I'm not suggesting that someone who's active in the military to smoke, but seriously people, more people than you would think smoke dope. Whoever suggested a dishonorable as a repercussion has punched the correct. If you're willing to smoke while serving, be prepared to pay the ultimate price if you get caught.
  17. Buzzby

    Buzzby Buddhist Curmudgeon

    First of all, if you don't want to be banned, don't call people names.

    Second, you've revived a thread that's been dead for five years. If the guy enlisted, he's already finished his enlistment.
  18. gaijin

    gaijin New Member

    Don't do it. Go to college. Student loans are cheap and you have lots of years to pay them back. If you already enlisted just don't show up for basic and you will be released. If you go in and smoke you WILL get busted. Tests are under very close supervision, totally random (unless under suspicion) and with little or no warning to report to the base clinic within a very short time frame. When, not if you get caught you will have a dishonorable military discharge which will haunt you the rest of your life. Think very carefully... your only possible hope of success would be to use the catheter method to drain your bladder and replace your urine with a clean sample. But think of the logistics of learning to use catheters, getting your hands on them and then keeping them handy enough to be used at a moments notice. Plus the discomfort and infection risk. Go to college.
  19. grillmeats

    grillmeats No Longer Active

    People please read when this thread started. This dude is probably doing something with his life now besides smoking.
  20. inthedissonance

    inthedissonance New Member

    I usually lurk, but I just had to log in and say this statement is pretty damn hilarious with the advantage of hindsight. ;)

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