Social anxiety?

Discussion in 'Philosophy' started by catsruleerything, Apr 12, 2013.

  1. catsruleerything

    catsruleerything New Member

    So tonight I was invited to go to a lil kickback at my friends house, nothin too bonkers. A couple of hours before I was just taking it easy cleaning, listening to a tribe called quest and whatnot just takin a few hits from my pipe. Around half an hour before I was gonna go, I was getting pretty eager to leave and getting all excited and what not. As I was about 5 minutes away from my friends house I begin to have mad doubts. (mind you I finished off my bowl a few minutes before I left) I began to think way to much of all these social situations that I would have to place myself in and how I would react to all of them, I was about to turn down his street but decided against it and came back home to survey what had just happened, and why I did what I did. I've been smoking for about 3 years now, and I've never really had this problem until recently. I've gone to parties and smoked before, yet I've shown up sober so maybe my thoughts haven't been as enhanced, but I've smoked while I had been there and felt fine.
    But also as I was about to turn down my friends street I saw two cars following pretty close to one another and had dumb paranoia, thinking that they may have been my friends and what I'd have to say to them if they saw me. So I kinda took a long route back home feeling like an idiot the whole way, then just a couple minutes ago I saw three cars drive past my house and I'm pretty sure I recognized one of my friends' car and got all paranoid again; now I honestly consider myself to be more of an introvert when it comes to smoking, I'd much rather chill with maybe two good friends and watch tv or movies on netflix, or even play video games at someones house, but as a senior and as graduation is rapidly approaching that doesn't seem to be a common interest among my peers. Aggh, it feels mentally embarrassing when this happens. Don't get me wrong I love smoking, but alot of the times I feel horrible about being such an introvert. I'm sort of always blowing people off when I get invited to parties because I'd much rather chill alone, but I find it hard to tell anyone cause I feel like more often than not, they wouldn't understand some of the negative aspects that I feel are brought out by smoking.
    Because of all this I'm worried about getting an anxiety attack in front of everyone and going all silent. Still I love smoking and don't want to stop because when I don't get all freaked out like that it's really enjoyable. Anyways I can still probably go to my friends house, but I'm not sure if I really want to, since I would feel awkward thinking they just drove past my house. I just feel horrible that I can't seem to really find anyone to tell this too without feeling awkward about it, I would just feel misunderstood I suppose. (Sorry if that was a bit of a ramble I'm a little stoned.)
  2. Buzzby

    Buzzby Buddhist Curmudgeon

    The best way to insure that you'll get an anxiety attack is to worry about getting an anxiety attack. You're over-thinking the whole situation. When you get off on one of these worry thought-loops, since yourself a song or recite a mantra. IOW, derail the thought-loop. One of the prime rules of consciousness is that whatever you focus your attention on, you'll get more of it.

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