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Old 10-06-2004, 01:09 AM   #1
Tizapthekeg420
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heres a story i started writing when i was like 16 and in the midst of depression. im 18 now and it was kind of interesting to read how i felt back then. so here it is.if positive feedback is given ill finish it.

It started out as just another Friday. The overcast clouds made the morning especially gray and gloomy, with no hint of sunshine to come.

The piercing alarm of Josh’s clock penetrates his ears as he wakes from his deep slumber. Rolling over in bed he slaps his hand down. Just five more minutes. As he lay there, motionless, he begins to reflect on his latest dream.

I was holding a boxing match with friends in the street outside my house. Some little kids were spotted in bushes down the street and I immediately gave chase for some reason. The crowd at my house followed me. Then I gave up and decided to go home. Again for reasons unknown. But while I walked up my driveway an unknown car pulled up to my driveway, backwards, and followed me to the front door. I felt threatened at the time and as the man stepped out I remember standing my ground. He looked Spanish and had a mustache, yet I couldn’t identify him.

Before he knew it 5 minutes had passed. Treasuring the last seconds of comfort Josh rises and curses the coldness of his room. He knows every night before he goes to bed that he will regret the cold in the morning. Yet every time immediate comfort overrules common sense and the window is opened before climbing beneath the sheets.

Clothes are hastily grabbed from a combination of the floor, closet, and dresser. An outfit sufficient for the day is adorned before trudging to the bathroom. Here his teeth are brushed and hair wrestled into submission. Satisfied enough with his appearance Josh grabs his keys and cell phone from his computer desk and heads straight for the front door, avoiding all contact with family members.

Josh successfully makes it to his car without saying a word and as he opens his door the familiar smell of herb smothers his nose. I really need to do something about this smell he thinks it won’t be a good situation if I get pulled over. As he turns on the car and fidgets with the heat he can not help himself from noticing, again, the poor inside state of his vehicle.

After selecting a burned cd of his mix, Josh begins the monotonous ride to school. Before he realizes it he is in the school parking lot. Again his lateness bars him from any kind of decent spot and is forced to park as far away from the school’s entrance as possible.

Not so convenient he thinks, as he observes how vulnerable he is to prying eyes from the nearby street, but I’ll be quick.

He mechanically removes his pipe and weed from the middle compartment, packs the bowl, and takes a hit. Nothin’ like the first rip. A successive string of hits are taken until the bowl is halfway filled with ash and then the car window is rolled down to empty the finished contents of the pipe. Another bowl pack is considered, but given the time he knows he can’t. So visine is dropped into his eyes and the materials are placed back snuggly.

A satisfying rush immediately greets Josh as he steps out the door. Everything catches his attention as his eyes dart around. The trees, the wind, the few people drifting toward school, the red pick-up truck pulling in, the assistant principal. **** he thinks as he avoids eye contact while passing him. A number of thoughts scatter through his head at this time, and he doesn’t realize he’s safe until he’s at the entrance. Sweet thinks Josh as he opens the heavy glass door.

He tries to seem as normal as possible as he walks down the halls toward his homeroom. Entering, he feels every set of eyes in the damp room turn on him. Josh feels extremely naked and makes a B line for his seat at the very back of the room. He finishes out the rest of his homeroom time immersed in a drawing.

The bell rings. Everyone in the school now pours into the hallways. Hectically Josh heads to his English class. Acknowledgement of class acquaintences are made as he takes his seat. The class time is spent watching a movie, to Josh’s delight.

Before he knows it the passing bell rings again. He is indifferent as he makes his way to Spanish because he has cut the class all last week. However, his best friend Abe is in the class and he decides it is worth a few minutes of akwardness to talk to his buddy all period.
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Old 03-12-2008, 06:20 AM   #2
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story has potential...im in high school so i can relate...keep writing it!
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Old 04-17-2008, 03:11 PM   #3
neconide
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[quote=Tizapthekeg420;497108]heres a story i started writing when i was like 16 and in the midst of depression. im 18 now and it was kind of interesting to read how i felt back then. so here it is.if positive feedback is given ill finish it.

It started out as just another Friday. The overcast clouds made the morning especially gray and gloomy, with no hint of sunshine to come.

The piercing alarm of Josh’s clock penetrates his ears as he wakes from his deep slumber. Rolling over in bed he slaps his hand down. Just five more minutes. As he lay there, motionless, he begins to reflect on his latest dream.

I was holding a boxing match with friends in the street outside my house. Some little kids were spotted in bushes down the street and I immediately gave chase for some reason. The crowd at my house followed me. Then I gave up and decided to go home. Again for reasons unknown. But while I walked up my driveway an unknown car pulled up to my driveway, backwards, and followed me to the front door. I felt threatened at the time and as the man stepped out I remember standing my ground. He looked Spanish and had a mustache, yet I couldn’t identify him.

Before he knew it 5 minutes had passed. Treasuring the last seconds of comfort Josh rises and curses the coldness of his room. He knows every night before he goes to bed that he will regret the cold in the morning. Yet every time immediate comfort overrules common sense and the window is opened before climbing beneath the sheets.

Clothes are hastily grabbed from a combination of the floor, closet, and dresser. An outfit sufficient for the day is adorned before trudging to the bathroom. Here his teeth are brushed and hair wrestled into submission. Satisfied enough with his appearance Josh grabs his keys and cell phone from his computer desk and heads straight for the front door, avoiding all contact with family members.

Josh successfully makes it to his car without saying a word and as he opens his door the familiar smell of herb smothers his nose. I really need to do something about this smell he thinks it won’t be a good situation if I get pulled over. As he turns on the car and fidgets with the heat he can not help himself from noticing, again, the poor inside state of his vehicle.

After selecting a burned cd of his mix, Josh begins the monotonous ride to school. Before he realizes it he is in the school parking lot. Again his lateness bars him from any kind of decent spot and is forced to park as far away from the school’s entrance as possible.

Not so convenient he thinks, as he observes how vulnerable he is to prying eyes from the nearby street, but I’ll be quick.

He mechanically removes his pipe and weed from the middle compartment, packs the bowl, and takes a hit. Nothin’ like the first rip. A successive string of hits are taken until the bowl is halfway filled with ash and then the car window is rolled down to empty the finished contents of the pipe. Another bowl pack is considered, but given the time he knows he can’t. So visine is dropped into his eyes and the materials are placed back snuggly.

A satisfying rush immediately greets Josh as he steps out the door. Everything catches his attention as his eyes dart around. The trees, the wind, the few people drifting toward school, the red pick-up truck pulling in, the assistant principal. **** he thinks as he avoids eye contact while passing him. A number of thoughts scatter through his head at this time, and he doesn’t realize he’s safe until he’s at the entrance. Sweet thinks Josh as he opens the heavy glass door.

He tries to seem as normal as possible as he walks down the halls toward his homeroom. Entering, he feels every set of eyes in the damp room turn on him. Josh feels extremely naked and makes a B line for his seat at the very back of the room. He finishes out the rest of his homeroom time immersed in a drawing.

The bell rings. Everyone in the school now pours into the hallways. Hectically Josh heads to his English class. Acknowledgement of class acquaintences are made as he takes his seat. The class time is spent watching a movie, to Josh’s delight.

Before he knows it the passing bell rings again. He is indifferent as he makes his way to Spanish because he has cut the class all last week. However, his best friend Abe is in the class and he decides it is worth a few minutes of akwardness to talk to his buddy all period.[/quote[



that was amazing. Keep up the good work, give us some more!
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Old 06-03-2008, 05:49 AM   #4
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i'd like to read more of this please its very good and entertaining!
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