The Muffin Theory

**Richi** · 08-08-2006, 06:20 AM

I posted this philosophical theory on Cheap Talk a while ago, but decided it fits in here well to. What ya think?

The Muffin Theory

Let’s begin. Almost all of us, at one point in our lives, have eaten a muffin. We either buy one, or receive it, or make them ourselves. But whenever we choose one, we tend to subconsciously look for one with the most chocolate chips. Chocolate chips are the highlight of the muffin, without them, it would be quite plain. But there are never quite enough in the muffin. Most people could safely say they would have preferred to have a few more chocolate chips in their muffin, to make the muffin more enjoyable. But not many people ever get too many chocolate chips in their muffin. Now, to get to the heart of the matter. When we do look at a certain selection of muffins, we assess which is the optimal muffin with the highest abundance of chocolate chips. We do this because we know there is rarely too many chocolate chips, therefore there is usually not enough chocolate chips. But when we look at one particular muffin, we only see the top portion of the muffin. Essentially, only one-sixth of the muffin, if it were a cube, because the cylindrical side and bottom of the muffin is covered in a wrapper. Furthermore, we disregard the inside of the muffin because we simply have no way to determine the quantity of chocolate chips in that portion of the muffin, until we un-wrap and begin to consume it. Let’s continue. We base the muffin we choose merely on the chocolate chip count on the top of the muffin, a substantially small amount of information. Then, we assume that the muffin we have chosen has more chocolate chips then the other muffins. If we look at the manufacturing process of a muffin, we notice that chocolate chips are mixed into the other components of the muffins randomly. Therefore, the chocolate chip positioning throughout any single muffin is quite random. To conclude, in all possibility, any muffin that has more chocolate chips on the top portion of its surface area is inclined to have less chocolate chips throughout the rest of it. The question should not be “which muffin has more chocolate chips”, but rather, “where would I like the chocolate chips in my muffin to be situated”. Therefore, the search for the muffin with the most chocolate chips is, in reality, a superficial search, as no muffin has more chocolate chips than any other muffin. If we could, we would look at the bigger picture, possibly the inside portion of the muffin, but since we cannot, we simply judge the quantity of chocolate chips by what we see at first glance. Is this the best way to choose your muffin? Or does it really not matter, because we have no way of knowing which muffin has more chocolate chips until we thoroughly examine every morsel of the chosen muffin, and then decide if the chosen muffin was the optimal choice.

~MASTA{*}SHAKE~ · 08-08-2006, 06:27 AM

its kinda a elongated version of 'you cant judge a book by the cover; but its kinda interesting, i coulnt stop reading it lol......maybe you should write a book

imported_Lebowski4Prez · 08-08-2006, 06:45 AM

I'm too sober to truly appreciate "Muffin Theory"...I would read your book, as long as I had marijuana...

imported_replica · 08-08-2006, 09:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lebowski4Prez

I'm too sober to truly appreciate "Muffin Theory"...I would read your book, as long as I had marijuana...

I'm too high to truly appreciate you "Muffin Theory"... Munchies... oh so bad.

Insaneteacher · 08-08-2006, 06:46 AM

I prefer blueberry muffins.

Equilibrium · 08-08-2006, 07:33 AM

you cant tell if one has more chocolate chips or if there all the same.there is no right choice. Is that what you're saying?

tehbagel · 08-08-2006, 08:36 AM

Poppyseed Muffins All The Way!

**Richi** · 08-08-2006, 04:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Equilibrium

you cant tell if one has more chocolate chips or if there all the same.there is no right choice. Is that what you're saying?

Hm... almost.

Yea you can't tell if one muffin has any more chocolate chips than any other particualer muffin just by looking at the outside of the muffin. If you do pick a muffin with more chocolate chips on the top of it, (where you can physically see) then the rest of the muffin will probably have less. Chance has is that all the muffins are probably the same in their number of chocollate chips.

SmkrSuperHero · 08-08-2006, 05:44 PM

i really only like the muffin's top anyways so thats all that matter to me....i like the muffin top...the rest like wut ever to me :-) anyone agree that the best part is the top ? and since i like the top the most i choose the one with the most on top :-)

imported_Lebowski4Prez · 08-08-2006, 06:14 PM

Yeah I agree...but I never waste the bottom...

Remember that episode of Seinfeld when there was that restaurant where they only sold the tops of the muffins and threw out the bottoms...mwahahah

08-08-2006, 06:20 AM	#1
Richi Inhibiting Inhibitions Join Date: Dec 2004 Posts: 1,897 Grams: 11,556.73 Thanks: 934 Thanked 984 Times in 363 Posts Stock Portfolio Total Value: 0.000 Gain/Loss: -1.000%	The Muffin Theory I posted this philosophical theory on Cheap Talk a while ago, but decided it fits in here well to. What ya think? The Muffin Theory Let’s begin. Almost all of us, at one point in our lives, have eaten a muffin. We either buy one, or receive it, or make them ourselves. But whenever we choose one, we tend to subconsciously look for one with the most chocolate chips. Chocolate chips are the highlight of the muffin, without them, it would be quite plain. But there are never quite enough in the muffin. Most people could safely say they would have preferred to have a few more chocolate chips in their muffin, to make the muffin more enjoyable. But not many people ever get too many chocolate chips in their muffin. Now, to get to the heart of the matter. When we do look at a certain selection of muffins, we assess which is the optimal muffin with the highest abundance of chocolate chips. We do this because we know there is rarely too many chocolate chips, therefore there is usually not enough chocolate chips. But when we look at one particular muffin, we only see the top portion of the muffin. Essentially, only one-sixth of the muffin, if it were a cube, because the cylindrical side and bottom of the muffin is covered in a wrapper. Furthermore, we disregard the inside of the muffin because we simply have no way to determine the quantity of chocolate chips in that portion of the muffin, until we un-wrap and begin to consume it. Let’s continue. We base the muffin we choose merely on the chocolate chip count on the top of the muffin, a substantially small amount of information. Then, we assume that the muffin we have chosen has more chocolate chips then the other muffins. If we look at the manufacturing process of a muffin, we notice that chocolate chips are mixed into the other components of the muffins randomly. Therefore, the chocolate chip positioning throughout any single muffin is quite random. To conclude, in all possibility, any muffin that has more chocolate chips on the top portion of its surface area is inclined to have less chocolate chips throughout the rest of it. The question should not be “which muffin has more chocolate chips”, but rather, “where would I like the chocolate chips in my muffin to be situated”. Therefore, the search for the muffin with the most chocolate chips is, in reality, a superficial search, as no muffin has more chocolate chips than any other muffin. If we could, we would look at the bigger picture, possibly the inside portion of the muffin, but since we cannot, we simply judge the quantity of chocolate chips by what we see at first glance. Is this the best way to choose your muffin? Or does it really not matter, because we have no way of knowing which muffin has more chocolate chips until we thoroughly examine every morsel of the chosen muffin, and then decide if the chosen muffin was the optimal choice.

08-08-2006, 06:45 AM	#3
imported_Lebowski4Prez Fiend Join Date: May 2006 Posts: 971 Grams: 5,403.25 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Stock Portfolio Total Value: 0.000 Gain/Loss: 0.000%	I'm too sober to truly appreciate "Muffin Theory"...I would read your book, as long as I had marijuana... __________________ Life's Pretty Fucked Up Right NowShouldn't I Be

08-08-2006, 06:46 AM	#5
Insaneteacher Friend of the Devil Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 1,504 Grams: 5,009.93 Thanks: 5 Thanked 12 Times in 7 Posts Stock Portfolio Total Value: 0.000 Gain/Loss: -1.000%	I prefer blueberry muffins. __________________ I watched with glee While your kings and queens Fought for ten decades For the gods they made I shouted out, Who killed the kennedys? When after all It was you and me

08-08-2006, 07:33 AM	#6
Equilibrium A Tryptophan Turkey Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 1,633 Grams: 13,851.29 Thanks: 1,354 Thanked 337 Times in 171 Posts Stock Portfolio Total Value: 0.000 Gain/Loss: 0.000%	you cant tell if one has more chocolate chips or if there all the same.there is no right choice. Is that what you're saying? __________________ I got hip-hop taste buds I wanna hear that base when i make love wanna hear some lyrics when i wake up write rhymes to get me through a break up

08-08-2006, 08:36 AM	#7
tehbagel Jr. Member Join Date: Aug 2006 Posts: 813 Grams: 2,781.30 Thanks: 0 Thanked 2 Times in 2 Posts Stock Portfolio Total Value: 0.000 Gain/Loss: 0.000%	Poppyseed Muffins All The Way! __________________ I've got over 550 posts at the 420 lounge with 1024 rep points. So go ahead, punk. Call me a noob.

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