Ninyaha

Hello all,

I wrote this poem after falling into a deep pit of depression, which was caused by obsessive thoughts. After hitting a low in terms of depression, I really didn't care about anything. With this apathy came realizations. I realized much I had never before realized. I started to see things in a new light, from a new perspective. Life was no longer care-free and beautiful. The more I realized, the more depressed I felt. Anyways...this is my first, but I just want to know if you guys can understand what I was getting at. Any feedback would be greatly appreciated.



There was one point in my life
When I did not feel here
I began to question everything
And reality became unclear

And so this went on
Day after day
I became a new person
And the old one faded away

I started to see things
For what they really are
I was no longer oblivious
Ignorance had gone afar

I realized things I had never before
About the way everything worked
All started to make sense
But in a different light this sense lurked

This light was not as bright
As the light once before
Nothing really mattered
Life was beautiful no more

And so this apathy continued
Day in and day out
More realized I became
Everyone was a lout

I realized the fact
That most people are pseudo and fake
Even friends will fuck you over
For their own gain and sake

The ruffian gets more respect
Lie after lie, hit after hit
The youth will always respect
Those who do not give it

I realized the power
Of the human mind
So much is psychosomatic
Everyone is blind

I questioned everything
Religion, philosophy, thoughts and theories
So much would contradict
All were but unsolved queries

I started to see things differently
Materialistic I was light-years from
I valued nothing
My life was completely numb

Here I hit a the bottom
An apathetic low
Nothing in life mattered
All was filled with sorrow

I am no longer ignorant
A step ahead of the rest
I have realized so much
Yet do not feel blessed

And so I will trick myself
Into the life of an ignorant fool
Where life is worth living
And realizations are not cruel

I will leave these thoughts abandoned
To fade away in time
I will feel happy once again
And take back what was mine

Through diversion and distractions
I will succeed at this
I will again be ignorant
You see, ignorance is bliss