Marijuana.com

xxdr_zombiexx

The Future IS Unknown!
xxdr_zombiexx | 4.23.2004

I heard the Star-Spangled Banner played like never before,
some sort of fuzzy distorted guitar sound...

(Atlanta) I got to see Ol' Unknown Thursday night in Atlanta.

I have liked Unknown Hinson since sitting around with friends one night getting stoned and laughing my face off with his crazy lyrics. We laughed so hard we gasped ofr air and my face hurt the next morning.

My buddy called the day before the show saying "Dude..Unknown Hinson is at Smiths' tomorrow night! Let's go!" I agreed to it, but usually am not terribly motivated to leave my secure, undisclosed location.

But I did go hang out with my friend and his wife and played designated driver. We did a few bong hits and made our way to Smith's Olde Bar.

We sat in the car before heading in and got nicely stoned, smoking a joint of rather killer herb I had rolled for the trip, and went in. (Note: Normally I despise joints as wasteful, but it was perfect for a setting where I wanted to share with 2 other people but wanted no paraphernalia on me or in my vehicle. Cops, you know....)

We were just early and got to see his entire show, which began with a dramatic entrance. His band, just bass and drums, both looked a bit like Col. Sanders of KFC fame. They had white shirts with the little spagetti bowties same as Unknown.

Regardless of Unknown's antics, the Bass player stood patiently and politlely through the entire show, laying down the solid bottom line.

The drummer, of course, was a lot more active and by the end of the show it was clear he was a great drummer.

Unknown and the Band blasted out new songs and old, all of which are focused on drankin', stalkin' and kidnappin womens, tellin' womens to shut up and look purty,: wholesome family values.

A partial setlist from the evening: Foggy Winders, Polly Urethane (That's a purty name), Man to Man, Your man is gay, I want you on a silver platter, I aint afraid of your man, Venus Bound, Pregnant Again, Lingerie, and many other charttopping hits.

There is a link to Unknown's Jukebox below: you can listen to some snippets of these soon-to-be-classics.

He also played "Hippy Girl", an account of his experience picking up a college girl and expecting some sort of "compensation" for his efforts, only to end up stoned on his knees:

"She lit a cigarette, it smelt like burning leaves
I coughed my guts out, underneath the trees.

I heard the Star-spangled banner played like never before
some sort of fuzzy distorted guitar sound.

she did a hippy dance on the hood of my cadillac
while I got sick and crawled around on the ground."

Unknown, named after his daddy, don't like drugs or hippies. He plays country and western music for a livin' and only drinks party liquor. He also told us that he votes Republican. I swear it's all true.

Rock-Roll is straight from Hell...

He pulls out a small blank gun and fires a shot every now and then: "a message to all the womens" he says.

He stopped one song and confronted some guy in the audience: "I'm up here playin my charttoppin' guts out and you are going to mess with me? Shut up!" Then he called the sound engineer a "damned hippy".

He is hysterically funny, and very, very sick, but...most unexpectedly..he blew us all away with his guitar work.

I had expected him to be "good"...but I was simply amazed. He's a freakin' guitar MONSTER. If you are a guitar player, prepare to feel a bit humble.

He does stuff on his guitar that I was sure he did with a lap steel, making the thing sound like it was flying.

He wore that thing out. Many songs got extended solos, often preceded by his utterance "Oh...gonna pick one".

He did Hendrix, Trower, a version of Alice Cooper's '18' (the song that turned me on the rock music), as well as play masterful country-style sounds (which I normally despise).

Unknown ROCKED the house at Smiths. He played loud and long and did a nice encore....then was at the back of the club autographing merchandice and women's chests....

If you are in any the of cities below, do your self a favor and see him - but keep a eye on your womens:

4/24/04..........Birmingham, AL "Zydeco"
4/27/04..........Louisville, KY "Headliners"
4/28/04.......... Newport, KY "Southgate House"


5/06/04.........Alexandria, VA, "Iota Cafe"
5/13/04.........Hayward, WI, "LCO Casino"
5/21/04.........Charlotte, NC, "Coyote Joe's"

6/26/04.........Rowan County Fairgrounds, Salisbury NC
"Smokeout" Bike Rally The Horse Mag


7/30/04.........Hayward, WI, "LCO Casino"
7/31/04.........Hayward, WI, "LCO Casino"


The Unknown Jukebox

__________________
Alien Space Signal

There's no money for your issue so long as we're squandering $50 billion a year on the DrugWar. Ben Masel

Fear became the ultimate tool of this government - V.

 

xxdr_zombiexx

Mr. Hinson -

I had the good fortune to see you at Smith's Olde Bar on thursday April 22. I was one of the hippies.

I laughed my ass off at your show.

I was very impressed. I was quite humbled by your guitar playing.

I am the Editor at large for Marijuana.com, a website featuring news, commentary, and community discussion about cannabis prohibition and related subjects.

I know you aren't interested in this sort of hippy mess, but I wrote an article reviewing your show and linking it to several features on the main Unknown Hinson website, as well as current tour dates.
You can see it here: http://www.marijuana.com/420/showthread.php?t=29092

We average about 800,000 hits (visits, not tokes) per month and a million in a month is unsurprising. It is my hope that we can steer you some more traffic as well as spread the aura of the King.

Plus it would be fun to have more hippies at your shows...

Cheers, man!

Doc

smoking_joe_lee

Does Mr. Unknown plan to visit the west coast?
Supprised any hard core pot lover/ whiskey hater would enjoy
this type of show, but then again, his talent level must be quite HIGH.

Hey Doc Z, if as many people as you claim visit this site; 800,000
on average, often a million, why are these numbers never seen. Glancing
at todays home page the top number for views of any story, and
this one is an older one, is 421? I seldom see a poll reach 1000 votes,
and then it takes at least a week. Speaking of polls, the current one is problematic. When I click on "results" what appears on screan is
"invalid poll specified" What's with that?

One more thing. Since you have been to Atlanta, do they change
the ending of the national anthem to "the land of the free and the
home of the Braves?" Is the left fielder, Jones, really named Chipper?
Do they STILL do the tomahawk chop? Why did Jane leave Ted?
I'm smoking Joe and I approved this message!

xxdr_zombiexx

800,000 is the round average of "hits" per month - page visits is my understanding. I got that from the old site stats page.

Lately traffic is a little slow - I dont really know why. I know we get busier when college is in and not preparing for tests. Tuesdays are usually the busiest days of the week.

IT has been the case in the past story reads may not reflect Internet services like AOL and MSN, ignoring them or counting them all as one visit per day.

I dont know what to say about the poll - I will let the webmaster know. Voting depends on what the question is. If we ask a complex or very meaningful question, we get fewer responses than frivilous poll, like what's your favorite place to hide yer stash? Same reason we get fewer reads on medical article than "Marijuana found in cheesebuger".

I dont normally tolerate listening to C&W - I remember laughung out loud the first time I saw "Alan Jackson" on TV. I thought HE was a comedy act.

Unknown is just special. It's great getting high music because the guitar work is so good and he is so hysterical. I am still laughing about "Polly Urethane".

on edit - needed space to park 2 more pix for an article........