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petewagner33

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Peace Pipe Ditty
Copyright 2003 Pete Wagner

Well it was coming down to war, as both sides were pointing guns
And I was just thinking, like I do, 'bout the fate of the little ones
And how the good folks'll end up dead while the rich'll just end up richer
And it sure don't take a genius to see that something's ****ed up with this picture

So I worked out a little plan of sorts I think it's worth a shot
Of course there's no way of knowing, never is, whether it'd work or not
See we gotta get our so-called leaders to see past their strategies of destruction
To somehow reorient their greedy little thoughts toward a more peaceful function

So I took a big hit, and then it hit me back
There's just one thing that I know those ****ers lack
It's a peace pipe packed with the finest **** in town
Where they could take a hit and just pass the **** around

If you smoke the **** I smoke you know it all makes perfect sense
You'd have the Prez himself, the VP and the Secretaries of State and Defense
They'd be meeting at the big round table, with smoke rising up through the vents
Until the presidential bogart and "this meeting's adjourned gents, I mean dudes"

They would get all warm and fuzzy with a big old silly grin
And just sit back and watch TV and laugh at all their own spin
Then they would eat pepperoni pizza till the grease runs down their chin
And they might just have a guilty thought about this war they wanta get us in

So another hit, it hits me back again
Heck, there could even be a resolution at the U.N.
And they'd sanction only those who don't inhale
And should tensions rise, well just break out another bail

Then you could capture all their attention with just a VCR
Play Blues Brothers, pouring shots everytime they'd wreck a car
Then after ice cream you'd take 'em all out to the karioke bar
Then call it a night when you find the distance to the stage to far

Soon they wouldn't have a care about no weapons stash
Hell they'd use their own weapons to hide all those cans of corned beef hash
We'd all have these pot tokens, see, and you wouldn't even need no cash
Then the only war we'd ever know would be from reruns of MASH

So one more hit, one more toke
Draw it in slowly, holding in the smoke
Yeah you' might cough a little at first, but you'll never choke
And you'll never wanta fight a war and you'll always get the joke

But who am I kidding, those assholes are probably all on speed
They'd be smokin' crack before they'd ever mellow out with weed
They'd sooner send us straight to hell at execution speed
Then to realize that they're all just really friends in need

So when you watch em sell their war, well don't be surprised
We all oughta know by now, it just a pack of lies
But it may just all work out, to spell their political demise
And maybe then a more aromatic smoke will fill the skies

So one more hit, on the old peace pipe
Um, are you gonna finish that there bowl of tripe
Well you weren't before but now I think you're just my type
So take another hit, no this won't hurt a bit,
And yeah this is pretty good **** in the old peace pipe