mufasa5446

why do people cheat on eachother? why do girls cheat even though they're in love? I find that very sad that they're willing to risk a thing such as love. I know guys do it to, but I don't. I hold loyalty, trust, and love very high in my ideas. So why do girls cheat on the guys who will actually stick around for them?

and similarly, why do the asshole guys cheat on the good girls?

i know it goes other ways, but this just bewilders me sort of.

I sort of understand, but I just don't!

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Ler

Everybody is different. There are so many factors that go into everyone's decisions some that may be subconscious. I'm with you on the loyalty trust and love thing I put an emphasis on those aspects of a relationship as they are important. People cheat for lots of reasons and I think that is all there is to understand. Who knows.

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Doc Mitch

its a lack of respect issue. when you dont respect yourself, how are you going to respect somebody else?

volcomstoner

That's a good question though.
I'm sure there are many reasons that people will come up with to validate their choices.
The reason, no matter is completely irrational though.
I would say some would cheat because this person they are cheating with could be a once in a life time opportunity, while they know there is someone at home that will love them unconditionally.
I don't agree with cheating.
And I've never actually cheated on anyone. I like consider myself a very monogamous person in or not in a steady relationship.
I don't see why guys can fuck a whole bunch of women and get away with it because... ?? They do the poking? It's not fair that women are labeled as sluts.
There ARE some women out there though... that do NOT know how to treat; love for and care for a man like they should.
It's really hard to find true love these daze, love that will be forever and true. It's hard to find trust and true companionship.

sithregime

Love has nothing to do w/ it. It all has to do with what the cheater wants and is not getting. Futhermore, cheating is indiscriminating. Color, race, gender, sex, religion, money..they're all affected and the score is even.
When betrayed you can start w/ the question, "What does he/she has that I do not?" Your answer usually IS the answer. But it's deeper than that.
Maybe she gave him the attention he doesn't get from you? Maybe she DOES look better? Maybe sex is mind-blowing w/ her? Also the resolution doesn't mean you have to mimic his desire, rather more of WHAT he desires. How have you changed? How has he changed?
It all points back to what they're not getting.
There is one exception, playa's. But that's a lack of commitment issue and a different thread.

imFADED

Right time, right place. Wrong time, wrong place. Pick your poison.

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mufasa5446

yeah, but if your in a relationship with someone, and you both love eachother, why cheat? We were both getting what we wanted from eachother, so why would she cheat?

imFADED

You may be getting hat you wanted but as I said, in the right moment in the right place something just might happen. Uncontrollable or not, shit happens.

sithregime

Love has nothing to do w/ it.
True story: couple been married 10 years, he cheats and they separate. 6 years later they get back together and stay together for 10 years. He cheats again & they separate for two years. Finally, after knowing each other nearly 30 years they see eye to eye knowing they're wrong for each other and separate for good.
Not once has either of them ever stopped loving the other and still do to this day (4 years later).
WHY do they love each other? Despite his behavior? Any ONE of these reasons will suffice: they had 3 kids, they have 2 grand kids, they were there when both of their parents died, they started a life together, they bought the first home of their own, they supported each other financially, etc.
He's a very active 59yo and she is a homebody. That's where they differed.

Killerchron

Good topic! Cheating, in my mind, is the ultimate dishonesty. IMO trust is the most important aspect of a relationship.

I have been cheated on...and it hurts, a lot. With that said, I feel that if you are truly in love with someone, it feels as if the thought doesn't cross your mind. Sure, there are always temptations, but think of how you would feel if the person you cared about/loved dropped that news on you........

Edit : post # 420!! woot woot!!

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