eaglez771

I know its long, but trust me, its worth your time. Read these while your high and you will be able to truly grasp what I am saying. I've showed this to my friends while they were high, and they were totally blown away. I guess you could say I've been in a very "thinking" state of mind recently. Heck last night I was able to explain time travel and alternate universes to all my friends while I was high. That also blew them away lol. Tell me what you guys think of this because I plan on someday making these all into a book.

REALIZATIONS

• Everyone has an “energizer bunny” inside them. You know, that energizer bunny that hits the drums on the commercial advertising the long lasting battery. When your really fuckin baked, turn on some music. You will realize that your heart will be really fast, and as you dance to the music and have a lot of energy, the energizer bunny inside you is hitting the drums really fast. The more energy you have and the faster your heart beats, the faster the bunny hits the drums. Same goes for when you’re tired and your coming down from your high. Your heart beat slows, you’re really tired, and you don’t move much. Thus, the energizer bunny inside you is beating its drums really slowly, until eventually you fall asleep and the energizer bunny does not hit the drums anymore.
• All cars and vehicles transform. When your really baked, you obviously get very hungry, and thus have to drive your car somewhere to get munchies. Now you might ask, what is it that gets me safely to my destination so I can munch? Well, when your driving around, especially when your on that ramp that merges onto a highway (where you have to increase speed), your car transforms into a transformer, so that the transformer can get you to your destination safely and in one piece. The transformer is very smart and high tech, so it knows how to get stoners to places the safest way possible. Trust the transformer!
• Water is like a soothing, magical essence that sobers you up and brings you back to your natural state. If you’re like half baked, and you take a shower, it obviously feels extremely good. Yet at the same time, when you get out of the shower, you are completely sober. The reason being is because when the water falls on you in the shower, it brings you back to your natural state, aka, when you were a baby in your mother’s fetus and there was water and fluid surrounding you. Humans are 70% water, so that is the reason why water brings you back to a natural and normal state.
• If you have a mask, you can be anything when you’re high. If a person is really fucking high, all they have to do is put on a mask or costume of anything, and in their mind, they become that mask or costume and think that’s what they actually are. For instance, on Halloween this past year, I was really baked and put on an alien mask (which for some reason reminded me of the devil). Literally, I began walking along the streets saying “I am the devil. I am the devil. Muahaha”. Putting on a mask or costume gives you a very unique feeling, and say you put on a mask of like a vampire or a power ranger costume. If you were really baked, your mind would think that you were actually a vampire or power ranger, and thus you would legit run around pretending to suck blood out of people or trying to shoot your red laser and do karate moves like a power ranger.
• You’re in the future. For some people, usually the ones that get really baked (but in my case this happens to me every time even when I’m not that baked), think that the world they are in is the future. For instance, if I’m high and I walk around through a mall, or a downtown area, or even just driving my car around, I look around at certain things like streetlights, cars, people, or any technology, and just get a huge impression that I’m not in the present, but I’m in the future. I’m legit like years ahead in the future, and I’m living with all this amazing technology.
• Trains, planes, trucks, and anything that can kill you is just a straight up boss. I don’t know why, but whenever I’m really baked, I just get this huge commanding, powerful, overwhelming, and controlling vibe from these things, especially the trains. I think its just because they have the potential to kill you, so when you look at them while baked, you just step back, and say to yourself “Wow. This thing is so big and powerful. If it hit me, I would be fucking dead. This thing is just a fucking boss that is huge and does whatever it wants”.
• You can see a person’s image, character, and what they will be like in the future. Now this only occurs to people that get like super fucking high (me). When I’m really fucking high like this, I can just look at a person, and just imagine in my head their entire life in like ten or fifteen years. It really is quite amazing cuz its like I can just see the future and look into the future while I’m high. I can look at a person and just picture exactly what they will look like, how much money they will have, what they will be wearing, and what kind of person they will be (ex: In ten or fifteen years they could turn out to be a horrible drug addict, a homeless person, a stuck up rich guy, an annoying weasel, etc).
• When you’re really high, your life plays out like a movie, and you can watch this movie from a bird’s eye view. I don’t know why, but this happens quite often to me, and if I’m really baked, I just feel like the entire situation I’m in, meaning everything I’m doing, saying, talking about, etc, is all just one big movie. For instance, when I first started smoking, and the first few times I got high, I just felt like I was watching a movie of a good kid who was just being corrupted by other people to start smoking weed. Now, since I’ve been smoking for over a year, whenever I’m high I just feel like the movie I’m watching is not about a noobie smoker who is a virgin to all the bad things in the world, but I feel like I have a little bit more experience and wisdom, and now it is me that has the power to corrupt others and bring them in to smoking (although I never really understood why the impression I got was one of “corrupting”). Bottom line, its fucking amazing to be high and just be able to watch the entire situation and everyone’s lives like a movie your watching from a bird’s eye view.
• Radio waves that play music (listening to the radio station) are attached to your car while you’re driving. When your baked and you turn on the radio and listen to music, the radio tower that’s really far away shoots a radio wave that comes in the form of a jagged and shaking line. This line attaches to your car, transfers into the radio player in your car, and then transfers to your head and feeds your mind strings and waves of music through the ears. This also goes for all music. Whenever you listen to music while high, the music just comes out of whatever its being played from, and goes into the air as just shaking strings, lines, and waves, which quickly reach every baked person’s ears, and the music just slides in to your ears (like your ears are just sucking it all in), and it brings great enjoyment to your mind and body. The music waves that go into your head spread throughout your body, they are inside you and they are the ones that are responsible for making people spontaneously dance (like me. Whenever I’m baked I legit just become one with the music, and it controls my mind and body and makes me do some crazy dance moves that I’ve never learned before). Music is fucking amazing when you’re high.
• Every person has something about them that distinguishes them from everyone else in the world. In most cases, this comes in the form of a mark on someone’s body, whether it be a scar, a bite from an insect, uniquely colored eyes, or anything that can resemble a sign on the body. For me, I feel that I am marked by a fucking huge bug bite that I got a few weeks ago. Although it is healed now, it is still a part of me, and I believe that when I am baked, it is still underneath my skin. I know it sounds crazy, but I whenever I think about this when I’m high, I feel like a superhero. That’s because Spiderman was bit by a fucking spider, which turned him into a superhero. This ties into my realization because when people have these marks and shit on them (in Spiderman’s case, it was a spider bite on his hand), a certain part of that person becomes a superhero. Like one of my friends was at the beach about a month ago, and along with his tan, his eyes turned a kind of goldish color from the sun. When I was baked, I looked at his eyes and immediately got this huge vibe and feeling that it was his eye color that resembled his sign/mark on the body.
• Running through the darkness, especially the woods, makes you feel like either a werewolf/wolverine or a ninja. I came to this realization when I was smoking with my friends one night in the woods, and in order to go back to the car, we had to run through the woods like fucking crazy animals. It was by far one of the greatest adrenaline rushes I’ve ever had, and I highly recommend it to every stoner. Running up that hill in the darkness just made me feel like an insane werewolf, kinda like those in that Underworld movie (the one with the vampires fighting the lycans). If your high, and wish to become a ninja, all you have to do is creep around in the darkness and pretend like your on a secret mission to kill something. While you do this, you can practice all your samurai moves and pretend to kill any person who gets in your way. I’ve never tried, but I think this would also go really well if you were playing manhunt late at night with your friends while you’re fucking baked off your ass. That would be fucking intense, and it would probably make you feel like a secret cover operative.
• When eating food, if it tastes fucking amazing, then it is probably from God. Yes, God. I once ate a butterfinger blizzard at Dairy Queen, and I got this huge impression that it was like eating God’s jizz. I know that sounds kinda gross, but trust me, it’s fucking God and if you eat his jizz (aka, eating any food that like oozes around in your mouth), its gonna taste fucking amazing.
• Your mouth turns into a carpet when your really fucking baked. A lot of times when I smoke, my mouth gets so fucking dry that it legit feels like it’s a carpet. I swear to god, my lips seriously shrivel up into my gums. That’s how bad of a cotton mouth I get. The dryness just makes me feel like my tongue, mouth, gums and everything is just turned into a carpet.
• Hot women turn into goddesses when you’re high. Whenever a person is really fucking baked, they can just look at a hot girl and just be like “Wow. That girl is just a goddess. She seriously is just a goddess like the one that are spoken about in ancient myths and shit”. This has happened to me numerous times, where I’m just walking around in a public place, I see a really hot girl, and I just think, “Omg. She is so fucking hot. She’s just a goddess and is only walking around in her human form”. Really hot girls are actually disguised as humans if you look at them while your high. One of the best things about weed is that you can look at a person and just see right through them and know everything about them, so in this case, If im really baked I can just look at a hot girl and just think “Wow. I know your disguised right now. I know that you’re actually a goddess underneath all that human skin”.
• All athletes and sports players are superheroes/Olympians. Watch an nba basketball game, a track race, or any major professional sporting even while your high. Your mind will come to a realization that your not just watching athletes on the television, but your actually watching modern day Titans/demi-Gods (you know like all those half gods and titans that were around in ancient rome and Greece). This realization first came to me when I was watching this past year’s Olympics, and I saw Usain Bolt run the hundred meter dash. Holy crap that was ridiculous to watch. You could just look at him and just tell, “Wow. This guy is not just an Olympian, but he has a connection with the gods. He’s like a modern day Titan, a demi-God”. Next time your baked and on youtube, search that video of Usain Bolt breaking the 100m dash record. Look at his face and eyes while he runs. He is legit looking into heaven, and he is looking into the eyes of God while he runs.

Obviously, there will be more of all this to come. Stay smokin!

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titty

I was reading the mask one but missed the whole halloween thing so I was laughing my ass off imagining a person wandering around with an alien mask saying "I'm the devil, I'm the devil..."

MagicSmoke

This was uhhhh ...something else LOL.

I don't think youll get very far trying to make this into a book though. Still funny lmfao.

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"If God made weed and man made beer, then who the fuck you people trustin up in here?"

eaglez771

Hahaha ya this is what goes on in my head when im baked. My mind just goes crazy and I think about things in a COMPLETELY different way lol.

And yea omg halloween was fuckin hilarious I remember that night. I felt so amazing and powerful cuz I just kept going around talking in a deep demented voice saying I was the devil. Lol then I remember I saw a little statue on someones door of like a little demon thing and it was lit up in red lights (the whole thing was a decoration), and I started FREAKING out.

EDIT: and trust me, if you read this while your baked, you will understand EVERYTHING and none of it will sound like crazy shit it will all make sense.