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President Bush Sells Louisiana Back to the French


President Bush and a giddy Jacques Chirac shake hands on the deal.

BATON ROUGE, LA. - The White House announced today that President Bush has successfully sold the state of Louisiana back to the French at more than double its original selling price of $11,250,000.

"This is a bold step forward for America," said Bush. "And America will be stronger and better as a result. I stand here today in unity with French Prime Minister Jack Sharaq, who was so kind to accept my offer of Louisiana in exchange for 25 million dollars cash."

The state, ravaged by Hurricane Katrina, will cost hundreds of billions of dollars to rebuild.

"Jack understands full well that this one's a 'fixer upper,'" said Bush. "He and the French people are quite prepared to pump out all that water, and make Louisiana a decent place to live again. And they've got a lot of work to do. But Jack's assured me, if it's not right, they're going to fix it."

The move has been met with incredulity from the beleaguered residents of Louisiana.

"Shuba-pie!" said New Orleans resident Willis Babineaux. "Frafer-perly yum kom drabby sham!"

However, President Bush's decision has been widely lauded by Republicans.

"This is an unexpected but brilliant move by the President," said Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist. "Instead of spending billions and billions, and billions of dollars rebuilding the state of Louisiana, we've just made 25 million dollars in pure profit."

"This is indeed a smart move," commented Fox News analyst Brit Hume. "Not only have we stopped the flooding in our own budget, we've made money on the deal. Plus, when the god-awful French are done fixing it up, we can easily invade and take it back again."

The money gained from 'T'he Louisiana Refund' is expected to be immediately pumped into the rebuilding of Iraq.

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Mamabudz

Repurchase agreement ... somehow it makes sense...no really...

Niteshift

and make Louisiana a decent place to live again.

Doesn't that presume it was decent in the first place?

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Mamabudz

Only as decent a place as any other Gulf Coast city or town

solutions

Typical for Big Satan to sell Louisiana back to the French.

The only reasonable option would have been (obviously) to sell it to the Dutch, who could then properly re-dike the place.

But no, it's pretty obvious. The Dutch are the enemy in the War on Drugs while the French are ideological puppies. It must be some sort of enemy of my enemy is my friend reasoning... aplied here.

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3 monkeys sitting under a coconut tree
discussing things as they are set to be
Said one to the other, now listen you two
there's a strange rumor that can't be true
they say man was descended from our noble race
but the very idea is a big disgrace
no monkey ever deserted his wife
or her baby to ruin their lives.
Damian Marley - Educated Fools

 

kinghelwig

This is the very first I've heard about bush selling la.to the french? How the hell can you sell a part of the united states to a foriegn country,and act as if everythings hunky dorie?That means we are not the united states anymore,and looking at it from that perspective,that scare's the crap out of me. Was any one informed of this?I keep up on current events but this one got by,or I would have written or emailed someone,doesnt this have to be put before the people?What are they going to pull next,join the EU,our country went to hell in a hand basket,selling La. to the French,the people we talk trash about and demean,and we sell them one of our states,and are all happy because we made a profit?yea but lost a state,what the Fuck is this country comming to,of all the stupid shit I've heard,that just about tops it. Now how is this going to affect the rest of the states,is LA. still required to follow U.S. laws or French laws,since it's owned by the French?Talk about convoluted,25 million profit,who profits from this sale surely not the u.s. they might as well of given it to them,It's time to go back to where my ancesters came from,and i'm a born american,Fuck,it's a sell out.

^_^truth

Iif we are selling states lets get rid of Texas while we are at it...I never did like that state.

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Insanity in individuals is something rare - but in groups, parties, nations and epochs, it is the rule.
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t-1000

thats a shame... you would sell back my, willie nelson's, and lance armstrong's home state? you gotta be kidding me

Sec

Does the sale include all of the original Louisiana Purchase or just what is now the State of Louisiana? Cuz...I don't really want to learn french and we'd be selling a helluva lot of prime agricultural real estate.

He should have held out for 10X the original sales price. There he goes again, french kissing some ass... (or is it kissing french ass?).

That's funny shit, I don't care who you are...

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Explicit

It was a joke + look at the date this was posted.

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