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Discussion in 'Humor and Jokes' started by Captainwhoosh, Jun 3, 2008.
aha you know when your high when your driving on two lane.
so hard to focus!
You've just spent an hour looking at pizzas to order online, then remember you have some (delicious) veggie dogs in the fridge that you can smother with condiments. This is happening right now... must. go. eat!
I got frustrated when my friend and I were ordering pizzas. I wanted supreme and he wanted meat-lovers. After an hour of weighing up the pros and cons and our argument got suprisingly heated. Never get in between a stoner and his munchies lol. I finally snapped and said, "Uhhhh whatever, you win. I'm stoned and have the munchies. Just order something!"
He ordered meatlovers but needless to say I enjoyed it anyway
You now you're high when you find yourself caught between the decision to go to the fridge or remain comfortably where you are. Comfort versus appetite, a stoners eternal struggle. You get up only to find yourself twirling around like Cosmo Kramer in an infinite thought loop. My friend actually did this just as his mother walked into the room asking, "What the hell are you doing?" I was crying with laughter and my friend didn't even reply because he began laughing uncontrollably too. His mother says, "Okayyyyy" and then leaves the room looking confused which made me laugh even more
How very true. I struggle with this every time I want something to munch on. The thing is, I never have the right thing I want to eat. So, a trip into town for food is required. That there is the major debate. Be active and get food, or just sit and be lazy. . . Most of the time its rationalized as go get food and be lazy afterwords.
While searching the snack aisle you whip out your phone and calculate how much food you can get with 5 dollars.
when your friends mom walks in and all you can do is stair at the computer screen and hope nobody asks you a question because you just can't look anyone in the eye without laughing or them notcing that your eyes are mcblaizin.
When during the first hour of being high u keep asking yourself why do I feel so wierd even though you know that you just smoked some bud but you keep thinking "that can't be the reason" lol happened to me a couple of times.
you're out in public past curfew with a friend and you both are using skateboards as rifles pretending you're playing Co-Op on MW2. Lol that was me last night
Lol wtf that sounds like it would be an interesting ass conversation while baked
You know you're high when you have a recliner as a computer chair and its the best choice you have ever made.
You know your high when you debate corperal punishment with a tree
you know your high when your parents walk in your room and you stare at the computer and say i need to poop and run into the bathroom so you dont get cought high, then sit on the toilet in deep though for a half hour. have done this many times
This reminded me, A true story
Once upon a time there was two friends who were rather high, On their way to a kebab shop to feed their munchies. On the way they decided to take a short cut across the old football field and heard someone shouting, due to it being dark they could not see and though nothing of it. On the way back from the Kebab shop they again heard the shouting and saw a lad lying down on the grass, We walked over to him and he stood up. The lad asked if we had a spare ciggy whilst stumbling all over the place, But we didn't have one when asked what he was up to and if he was alright his reply was
"Nah, Im sound me lads, Im just chillin with boys, Innit"
And then pointed at a tree
EDIT:You know your high when you decide to write in story form but it goes from third person to first person
hahahaha i think that one made me laugh the most
How did you not throw up from that
When you are at a friends house after you just blazed and you think you really shitted your pants from smoking so much. You believe it so bad that you start thinking you smell it and go to the bathroom and check only to find out it was all your imagination.
When your friend asks for the eye drops for an hour straight but every time you're about to get them out of your backpack you forget and start talking about something completely random.
When you and your friend are laying down on a public sidewalk eating a whole box of pizza and downing a 2 liter of soda. Cars and people are passing by looking at you but you don't give a damn because you have pizza.
(I did all 3 of those lol)
You know you're high when you stand an a forest and you notice hummingbirds communicating with one another. This was mind blowing next to finding out they can sit perfectly still on a branch.
You know you're high when you leave the socks that you were wearing over at your friend's house.
hahaha i fucking hate when i do that shit^^ especially when i wake up on the basement floor of somebody i dont know
When upon entering your house at 3AM and being greeted by your mother who asks you "Are you stoned..." , your response is
"Naw I biked home really fast"