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dumbOldWoman

Hi everyone, I'm a computer nerd, 50+ years old. I take 2 very tiny hits from a pipe usually every day (in a State with VERY liberal laws); and have for many years. It helps my creative spirit. I have been offered a job for HUGE company. The day I was offered the position, I quit smoking. But friends smoked around me for another two days before I realized I might be taking some in so I asked them not to smoke around me.

My pre-employment drug screen will be 32 days from day I quit (29 from day I even quit being around it). I'm drinking cranberry juice and lots of water. I get little exercise (I work 24/7) and I'm 15 lbs overweight. It wouldn't be so bad except this job pays 85% more than I've ever made in my life - it is job of a lifetime AND ... it's on the other side of the country. Giving up pot was easy; I won't be quite as creative, but for the salary difference I don't care!

I'm so afraid I'll flunk a dumb test I don't believe in. Can you all help me? Do you think I'll show positive in a urine test?

 

TeamRamrod

With 32 days in time you have an excellent chance at passing your test, just stop smoking now, continue drinking alot of fluids and i would probably be a good idea to try and fit in some exersize to burn out some of that THC, good luck!

dumbOldWoman

Thank you! I stopped 19 days ago and I'll be tested on day 32. I'll start exercising now - been wanting to anyway. New job will only be 40-hour weeks, not 80+-hour weeks like I work now, so I'll have free time to get fit again. Much appreciated. On to my new (less creative but highly lucrative) future.

FakeBoobsRule

Dumboldwoman, get a home drug test first. If you cannot pass using the first void of the day, go with substitution. Substitution is easier than you probably think and if you practice to get the temp right, it is 100% effective. Dilution is your next option. Drinking lots of water for days and days before the test is not going to help you get clean more quickly. Read the link in my sig if you don't believe me.

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Buzzby

Considering how little you smoked and the month of abstinence, I don't think you'll have to do anything special to pass your pre-emp UA. Don't drink too much water/cranberry juice/gatorade. I'd say your biggest risk is over-dilution.

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dumbOldWoman

I spent the last of my money on tests and cleansing products. But the box sat in the corner for few days; I didn't notice the KEEP REFRIGERATED on the top. Took 3 tests - all void (and now no time to get new test kits). This company gives urine test and I was told testee must strip to hospital gown. I was also told they give another test (in conjunction) and can tell if it's diluted and will refuse to hire if pee is too clean.

Okay: Keep myself hydrated (but save chugging until day of), Cranberry Juice, aspirin, exercise (aerobic), low fat leading up to then fat-load day before and day of? I've been reading like crazy.

Only drug I've ever taken is pot! And it's not right! But I'll play their games for the money ... know what I mean? Teeny-tiny hits (2 a day), good grief. Yes, you hear stress & indignation in my cyber-voice. Alcoholics can pass in few days - drunks get mean - but we mellow-people are treated like criminals.

/*END RANT*/

BTW, I neglected to say thank you. I appreciate it very much. I read the link. I'm taking this seriously. But I'm so nervous I'd kill for a hit (ha ha). Never again though; not worth it. Great but not worth it.

dumbOldWoman

Thank you Buzzby! Okay, no chugging water at all. Praying to the Herb Gods, bribery. Yes, all these products I bought I'd be afraid to take - maybe take a 1/4 what they recommend? Maybe just enough to tip the scales but not enough to be considered cleansing?

I just realized ... nothing anyone can say will reassure me. That is the self-hell we pre-testees must live with. I'm in this alone. And this is the only place I can even share my hell. What a way to get someone to stop smoking! Just threaten a drug test! ROFLMFAO!

Itzamna

its it just a time deal or will they randomly test? btw youve got nothing to worry about if its a piss test.

Buzzby

Being such a lightweight (2 hits a day) and having such a long period of abstinence (32 days), you really have nothing to worry about. If it makes you feel better to use a partial dose of the products you bought, it won't hurt unless you drink too much fluid along with it. If I was in your position I'd just be happy and not stress out as you are.

dumbOldWoman

Ya know ... for once (I can be stubborn), I think I'll listen, Buzzby, because otherwise I might take up drinking or smoking to handle the stress and I can't afford that either. I may be random tested after I start work but I won't worry then because I'll be clean and will stay clean.

I'll take 1/8 of what is indicated (so I feel I still have some control over it and I won't flip out). And I'll exercise (I need to anyway ... sitting in a computer chair 16 hours a day, 7 days a week for 4 years; no days off, has made me weak) ... and I may eat everything fattening for breakfast the morning of but I'll be doing it because I need to feel control over my future and not out of horrific panic.

I don't think you'd steer me wrong, Buzzby. I appreciate you satiating my fears and I'll let you all know what happens. 4/23 is start of my 2-day orientation. I would assume drug test will be first day. So expect to hear from me shortly after that. Bless ya!