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hermosthigh

Happy Wednesday!!

Today was my first drug test. I am 54 and a life-long daily user. I substituted Dr. Greens Agent X for my own urine. The first part of the test seems to have gone off without a hitch . . . here's my story (so far).

I do not own a microwave and decided to use boiling water to heat my product. Unfortunately it got way too hot (it did not boil, I used a home-made double boiler) and I had to wait about 15 minutes for it to cool down enough to be close to my skin. There was was still no reading on the temperature strip (meaning it was over 102 degrees) when I attached the hand warmer to the bottle, opposite the temperature strip.

The bottle was too large for my vagina, so I doubled up on my underwear and placed it infront, well below my waist. Wore loose jeans and a large sweater (fortunately it's very cool here today).

I live only 15 minutes from the testing facility. By the time I had arrived, I could feel that the contents of my bottle had cooled closer to my own body temperature. I expected to be kept waiting, but was called back in less than five minutes of my arrival.

I was not asked to empty my pockets. I did have to produce my driver's license and provide my ss #. The attendant locked up my purse. Had me sanitize my hands. Marked a line on a cup and said to fill it to the line. It looked like a very shallow line - I had been sweating that I didn't have enough product, but 3 ounces was MORE than enough. I had left overs.

Once inside the restroom, it was way too easy. In fact, this is one of the reasons practice is a good idea. I lowered my britches, pulled out the product. The temperature was now reading 102 degrees. Filled the cup to just above the line (after all, I wouldn't be able to actually see the line if I were peeing into the cup).

Set my cup on the TP rack, not the cool ceramic sink counter (someone mentions it zaps the heat right out) and pulled up my britches. Suddenly it occurred to me that I might be moving a little too quickly. I counted very slowly to sixty, holding my cup in my warm hands to prevent too much heat loss. Then, as a last gesture, I tossed some wadded toilet paper into the stool.

Handed my collector the cup, and she did not even check the temperature of the "specimen". She split the "specimen", I initialed the seals and was sent on my way.

BTW - after leaving the facility's parking lot, I removed the remaining Agent X from my pants and set it in my car door, the heating pad still attached. After going to the grocery store and then finally home (some 30 minutes later), the temperature strip was still reading 90 degrees for the remaining fluid.

What I Liked: The pre-mix was easy to use, the instructions very explicit and easy to understand and it's available locally.

What I Didn't Like: The bottle is too large, especially for a petite person like myself. I'm planning a trip to walgreens next payday to procure some small, empty bottles, in the event of another test.

Oh, and even though they provided a flip-top cap, I opted to keep the screw-cap on. I read in another post, that your bottle could make a gurggling sound as air replaces fluid.

So, phase one has gone off without a hitch.

Now . . . what happens next? This is still new for me.

Thanks!!!!
HMH