Why Santa Claus is a Jolly Stoner | Marijuana

Why Santa Claus is a Jolly Stoner


In honor of #TBT, Marijuana.com provides a slice of Marijuana History every Thursday. With this Thursday falling on Christmas, here’s our ode to Santa Claus.

A prominent urban legend on the web proclaims that “Santa Claus Was a Shroom-Tripping Shaman” because how else could he fly across the globe on a sled powered by magical reindeer tossing the world presents?

And if Santa has a penchant for magical mushrooms, then he certainly has a penchant for Kush. Because no man can eat a bag of shrooms without smoking a joint to settle his stomach.

Santa Claus may be more myth than man, but we’d like to think that his existence was sparked by the imagination of some 19th century stoners. Whatever the case may be, he undoubtedly embodies the characteristics of a guy who loves to get high.

Here are some reasons why Santa is just a jolly old stoner:

1. Santa works one day a year.

2. He only hangs out with guys (elves) and flying reindeer.

3. Santa always has a case of the munchies.

4. He loves cookies. Especially Girl Scout Cookies.

5. He tells his elves he’s going to diet and hit the gym after the holiday, but he never does.

6. DMX is on all his work playlists.

7. He’s never on time.

8. Santa is over 100-years-old but still loves his toys. Especially his PS4.

9. He began his journey in the Netherlands (for real).

10. No one knows his real name (Sinterklaas).

11. He never shaves.

12. He’s an introvert and hates clubbing.

13. Santa hates leafy buds.

14. If Santa sees kids, he flies away.

15. Santa always has a smile on his face. Because he knows. Oh, he knows.

View post on imgur.com

And here’s DMX doing Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. Merry Kushmas!

[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AXca4WcCzlo]

About Author

Barry has been writing about marijuana for over five years. Prior to joining Marijuana.com, Barry wrote about sports and music. His work has appeared on TIME, The Huffington Post, Deadspin, and elsewhere on the Internet. In his spare time, he enjoys disco and Kosher Kush.

Leave A Reply