On behalf of weed smokers everywhere, please do not buy us any more Cheech and Chong memorabilia or weed leaf-emblazoned socks this holiday season.
Pot some thought into it, please.
If you need help, Marijuana.com has compiled a handy gift guide to this year’s best accessories for that special stoner in your life. You’re welcome, feel free to thank us with an extra batch of those cookies you were going to make for Santa.
Cloud Pen Paragon
While many new vaporizer pens came across my desk this year, just two stood out from the competition and warranted repeated, if not incessant, use. One of them, the Cloud Pen Paragon, became my go-to pen solution quickly because it solved one of my biggest flaws: leaving my wax literally wherever I took my last dab, every single time. The Paragon, which also happens to hit better than virtually any pen on the market, includes an ingenious non-stick silicone container on the bottom of the pen that detaches for easy stash access. The chances of me losing the entire Paragon unit are far less than when I carry around my concentrate in its original envelope, where I tend to lose the remainder of the wax after about 3.2 dabs on average. Another proprietary feature the Paragon boasts is adjustable airflow, something severely lacking from competitor models. This allows you to open up the Paragon’s passageway to allow for higher (or lower) volume pass-through; imagine covering the opening of your garden hose with your thumb to achieve vastly more water pressure.
Portable Electronic Dab Rigs
As various weed consumption methods become increasingly normalized, one element that may be phased out is the torch used for heat in the process of dabbing. They tend to scare uninformed bystanders and truly aren’t necessary anymore with the growing list of available alternatives. Many wax enthusiasts have long preferred using “enails” to the traditional rig-and-torch setup, opting to wrap their nail in a steel coil hooked directly to a power source and thermostat to ensure dabs are enjoyed at the exact same temperature consistently. While these enails offer quite the vaping experience, they’re expensive and rather large to be carrying around regularly. Enter the portable enail, a small glass bubbler rig with a battery attachment reminiscent of a large wax vaporizer pen. These rigs have a contained heating element that regulates the temperature of the nail and spill-proof bubbler attachments to ensure you can take homestyle dabs anywhere you go.
No longer do you need a bulky box on your tabletop with long, sketchy, clear plastic tubing protruding out of it to enjoy your smoke-free flower. Today’s carcinogen-cutting cannabis accessories look more and more like something you’d see in “Men In Black” or on Batman’s utility belt — full of innovation, crafted with other-worldly engineering and stunning aesthetics. Part vaporizer, part bong, the cylindrical Hydrology9 is built with space-grade anodized aluminum alloy and borosilicate glass, so your significant other might actually let you keep this beauty on the coffee table full-time instead of in the basement with all of your other “gross bongs.” My favorite part of the Hydrology9 is something that every vaporizer since the beginning of time has needed but never included — a way to shimmy the weed around inside between hits so you don’t have to keep opening, shaking, tapping, and repacking. A dial on the bottom of the vaporizer allows the user to turn a heat-resistant, curved, steel rod that resembles a paper clip inside the flower chamber to essentially put the contents in shuffle mode so you can vaporize any bud that had gone untouched on previous hits.
The Easy Grinder requires some finesse, but it should — it’s for the elite-level smoker doing elite-level smoking activities. You wouldn’t entrust a Ferrari to a 16-year-old learning how to drive stick for the first time, and you wouldn’t use this bad boy to roll your first joint. This is some 10,000 hours stuff. At first glance, the Easy Grinder resembles some sort of taser or the massive thermometer a doctor would stick in your ear as a kid. All things considered, the Easy Grinder is a great investment for the connoisseur roller or an ideal gift for the “Sharper Image” smoker in your life who must try all marijuana-related technology that looks like it could be sold at an Apple Store. Either way, whoever ends up with the device will have a top of the line shredder that, with some practice, will perfectly grind up their stash until their heart’s content.
Portable Nectar Collector
Nectar collectors typically present a difficult dilemma for the cost-conscious cannabis consumer, as they are fun to use and highly effective yet tend to eat up stashes rather quickly due to the limitations of human self-control. However, a new model from Boundless that we recently reviewed on Marijuana.com aimed to change all of those preconceived notions about “honey straws.” The CF710 is a portable nectar collector that eliminates the need for a torch — and a rig for that matter. Instead of heating your nail and dropping concentrate onto it, the CF710 features an exposed quartz coil on one end that can be dipped into your wax and inhaled through the opposite end of the unit. An included dab tool and discretionary dish help the broke tokers out there avoid sticking the piping hot coil-end into their full supply of shatter.
The other pen that smoked the rest of the category this year was the Puffco+, a high-end portable vaporizer with a long list of unique traits that make it the perfect gift for the connoisseur on your list. Simply put, the Puffco Plus is stunning. The sleek, gunmetal pen looks more like a new Tesla rolling off the lot than it does a vaporizer. Calling the Plus a pen does it quite the disservice, honestly. Rather, Puffco calls their Plus model the “first ever pocket nail,” letting you know right off the bat to consider the Plus a complete dabbing experience instead of a traditional portable vaporizer pen. While other atomizers have exposed fibers, plastics, and metals that can be harmful when exposed to a high degree of heat, PuffCo employs an all-ceramic bowl design in the Plus. This coil-less design allows for equal heating throughout the entire chamber. Because the entire chamber can efficiently vaporize your concentrate, cleaning the Plus is a breeze — if not barely necessary. Beyond the beautiful design and impeccable vaporizing capabilities, the most impressive feature of the Plus was the brilliant dosing and delivery system. Puffco has inserted a dab tool of sorts — what they refer to as a Dart — into the mouthpiece of the Plus. When you unscrew the mouthpiece from the main unit, the ceramic Dart can be utilized to pick up your wax. It feels like you’re dabbing in the year 3017, guys.
Green Box Grown
This all-in-one indoor grow kit is the perfect gift for the cultivator of any experience level, as they won’t need anything else but seeds or clones to harvest their own supply. Forget growing a plant in your dingy bedroom closet that hasn’t been vacuumed since states started legalizing cannabis, this amazing system is clean, quiet, and won’t stink up your pad. The included nutrients and exclusive access to hundreds of helpful grow guide videos will have you producing legitimate product right under your roof in no time — well, a few months. Besides, buying this kit with all the components of cultivation you’d ever need will also save you a ton of money over alternatively buying each item you’ll inevitably have to purchase from separate retailers at full price. You know you’re not ready for a dog, let’s start slow with a plant in 2018 and see how you do.
For the cosmically-aware loved one on your holiday shopping list, these crystal pipes will help align their cannabinoids and chakras in a hurry. The hand-carved bowls come in a wide range of stone options including sea opal, purple amethyst, and rose quartz varieties and feature a carb so you can cherry every last bit of flower in your crystal. The handy stainless steel screen built into the crystals will ensure you don’t Wu Tang that whole bowl pack — plus, it makes the bowls a breeze to clean when you’re finished. If you drew your hippie cousin’s name in the gift swap and were going to buy a crystal for their bedroom shrine anyway, might as well get them one they can smoke out of.
Want to get high with Mother Nature while sitting on top of a rock in the middle of the forest? Afraid your glass bong won’t make it back in one piece without needing emergency duct tape to keep the corpse together on your long car ride home? Trying to catch a tan and toke in the ocean on your favorite dolphin floatie? Wherever life happens, the Roll-uh-Bowl silicone bong is sure to be the solution you’ve been searching for. Not only is the Roll-uh-Bowl able to change shapes like a Transformer, it’s also sturdy enough to withstand any potential calamitous drops and it’s far lighter than its glass counterparts. Flip it, squeeze it, hug it — you’ll love your silicone bong more than any piece you’ve ever had, if only because you’ll have it forever rather than the short-lived flings you had with glass that broke your heart. Requiring a tiny amount of water, the Roll-uh-Bowl bong won’t use up all of your sacred bottled water when you’re trying to blaze in the blazing desert heat or whatever festival you stealthily snuck your silicone into. The Roll-uh-Bowl collections include glow in the dark options so you can toke under the starry night sky or while hiding from your family with your cool cousin in a coat closet at Christmas Eve dinner.
With the Frost Pipe, all your winter wonderland weed dreams can come true with just one simple kit. Actually, on second thought, you probably aren’t having many dreams if you’re enough of a stoner that you’d try to make a smoking device using ice, let’s be real. But if you’re still looking for cool projects to do with your smoking buddies while you’re snowed in this holiday season, this is it. Just remember to wear gloves in the rotation so nobody can blame you for not sharing the smoke when the bowl gets stuck to your skin Ralphie-style. To make your own frost pipe, just assemble the mold, fill with water, and stick it in your freezer or frozen backyard. Rinse, let it shape for a minute, and you are ready to witness the birth of a smokeable ice sculpture. If you need a little more help, Frost Pipe has plenty of YouTube videos with step-by-step tutorials and creative ice pipe concoctions to make.
The Martian Rollie Bubbler
Roach clips are passé and sore throats are no fun, so when I stumbled upon the Rollie Bubblers from MJ Arsenal, my blunt-smoking regimen was forever altered. No longer would quarter-inch remnants be left to go stale in the ash tray with just enough sacrificial weed in them for another mini sesh at some point. No, enough was enough. The Rollie Bubbler allowed me to smoke joints and blunts all the way to the last sticky speck, all while passing that thick smoke through a layer of water to cool it off and save my throat from certain scratchiness. Put one of these bad boys in your favorite stoner’s stocking and watch them light up (literally) in excitement.